Braces and Retainers

            My daughter’s orthodontic journey began in elementary school when our dentist fit her tiny mouth with a Frankel contraception (a wire device).  When she came walking out of his office, trying to smile at me, I knew we were in trouble.  Sounding much like a middle school cheerleader, I exclaimed,  “Awwwwww…..how exciting!”  I am actually wondering how he managed to get a football helmet inside her little mouth. 

            On the ride home, I noticed that when she attempted to talk, she sounded like she suddenly had a speech impediment or was maybe even speaking a foreign language (I was hoping it was the latter). Glancing over at her, I now realize she not only has a speech problem, she is also a drooler!  Yep, my adorable daughter was now slobbering! 

            The worst part of this memorable experience was that this contraception had to come out when she ate….not an easy task.   I’ll never forget the day that we had to drive over an hour out of our way to go…..back to a McDonald’s on the interstate where we had eaten lunch.   Fortunately, her dad was willing to dig through garbage bags and was able to find the slimy thing.  I am not sure I would have won any mother of the year awards that day. 

            Eventually  the dentist realized that her cheeks looked like a greedy squirrel that had stored enough nuts away to last for the next ten years.  She was refitted with something a little more stylish appropriate for her mouth.

Footnote:  The following Sunday we had photographers at church because it was “Old Fashion Sunday”…..and wouldn’t you know, it was her picture that was chosen to go in the local newspaper. 

Footnote:  The short haircut is another story….a bad perm had to be cut off  (which I am now blamed for even though she begged for it).