Monday, December 30, 2013
Finally, the End of Pinterest!
For some, joining Pinterest means having to say goodbye
to friends and family. Good news for all
you who are hooked on Pinterest! I
finally got to the end of it today. So
now I guess I have to get off Pinterest and start doing some of the things that
I have pinned, like rock sweaters.
Tuesday, December 24, 2013
Monday, December 23, 2013
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas
Just like the ones I use to know
Where the white sands glisten
And the waves seem to listen
I’m dreaming of dewdrops
While wearing my favorite pair of flipflops.
(Growing up in Naples, FL)
Sunday, December 15, 2013
What, I won? I never
win anything…..OK, that might not be totally true, but I have never won a radio
show call in give-away, a door prize, or Publishers Clearing House (now that
would be sweet). I have won coupons to Smoothie King, six dollars playing the
lottery, and a Tupperware tiny scraper – great for cleaning your dishes and
pans (baaaahaaaaaa). I have actually
seen pop-ups saying I won something, but I never click on them for fear that a
naked person might pop up. So, why do I
feel like Donald Trump today?
I attended a Christmas party last night, and the hostess had
a shiny jar of money displayed, glinting from the Christmas tree
lights. The person who came the closest to guessing
the total would win it. I guessed $101
and it was $104…..yep, I won it. Oh, I’m
not finished….we also played a Christmas Monopoly game….won again! All in all, I won $211.00. This is why I feel like Donald Trump
today! A big thank you to the wonderful
hostesses, Debbie and Sandy!
Have you ever been the only person in an ugly sweater at an “Ugly
Sweater” Christmas party? I went to Goodwill and searched high and low for the perfect ugly sweater; I knew I would
know it when I saw it….you know the kind with poof balls dangling down a thick red
cable knit competing with nauseating hues or felt snowmen and reindeer flowing
across the front. However, I just could
not find a suitable ugly sweater for the party, so, I made my own. I simply printed pictures of the people that
would be at the party along with an “Ugly Sweater” tag and pinned them to a
sweater. Footnote: After arriving at the party, I discovered
that women actually wear pretty sweaters to these parties and just
call them “Ugly Sweaters”!
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Monday, December 2, 2013
Here is a sweet picture of two of my adorable grandsons. OK….so the halo of the one on the left might be a little tilted as he prepares to shoot his older brother with a bow and arrow. I can definitely relate to that twinkle in his eyes, and the halo worn a little to the side. Thank goodness God always gives us another chance to straighten those crooked halos.
Sunday, November 17, 2013
Puberty, pimples, periods, armpit hair, etc. Walking into the classroom Friday, a student flung her arms around me and started crying; or at least I thought she was crying. Concerned, I asked, “What on earth is wrong?” At this point she looked up, smiling, and bellowed, “We are learning about the birds and the bees in science, and it is soooooo scary!” I strived to look just as disgusted as she did! A teacher wears many hats!
Saturday, November 16, 2013
Sunday, November 10, 2013
Well, I finally get to mark something off my bucket list; not because it actually came about, but because it is no longer a possibility! “What Not to Wear”…….yep, I always wanted to be on this television show. Unfortunately, it has been cancelled.
I actually tried to convince a friend of mine to recommend me for the show. I envisioned myself putting on my worst outfit or pajamas and heading to Wal-Mart for my photo op. I even pondered dressing like Honey Boo Boo’s mom or a slightly hookerish look. Walking into Wal-Mart, my girlfriend, Beverly, would have been filming me (wink wink) in my horrible outfit. I would have even been willing to don a pair of “mom jeans” with a fanny pack if I thought it would have helped me make the show.
When I asked Beverly if she would recommend me for the show and tell the produces that she was fed up with my style, or lack thereof, her response was, “Noooooooooooooo, because I want to go on that show too!” Now if you open up your dictionary and look up “stylish” or “rocking that outfit”, I bet you will find a picture of Beverly. I guess Stacy and Clinton will not be popping out of a crowd any time soon to offer me my trip to NY with the $5,000 gift card!
Sunday, November 3, 2013
I now have 132 editorials to grade and 132 expository essays
I feel a new song coming on…..
let your babies grow up to be
♫ Don't let 'em
grade papers for just a few bucks,
♫Let 'em be doctors &
lawyers & such,..." ♪
♫Let 'em be doctors & lawyers & such,..." ♪
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Happy Birthday to my wonderful son, Buck. On the left, he is all smiles as he prepares to open his gifts. On the right, his big sister, Jenny, has now claimed his new toy. The doll is a Mattel Musical Love Notes - Bucky the Cowboy…..now a vintage toy. He plays harmonica sounds when you press his legs, arms and belly. Looking a little worn and tattered, Bucky, now sits proudly on display in my guest room. Unfortunately, Bucky is only worth about $16.00 now……not nearly enough to think about early retirement.
I cherish the years that brought us where we are today, but wish I had not counted the days to so many milestones like no more diapers, no more carrying 50 pounds of baby equipment to the car, no more car seats, or no more toys scattered all over the den. Now I think, “If I could just reach into this picture and hold these babies one more time!”
Monday, October 28, 2013
daughter’s orthodontic journey began in elementary school when our dentist fit
her tiny mouth with a Frankel contraception (a wire device). When she came walking out of his office,
trying to smile at me, I knew we were in trouble. Sounding much like a middle school
cheerleader, I exclaimed, “Awwwwww…..how
exciting!” I am actually wondering how
he managed to get a football helmet inside her little mouth.
the ride home, I noticed that when she attempted to talk, she sounded like she
suddenly had a speech impediment or was maybe even speaking a foreign language
(I was hoping it was the latter). Glancing over at her, I now realize she not
only has a speech problem, she is also a drooler! Yep, my adorable daughter was now slobbering!
worst part of this memorable experience was that this contraception had to come
out when she ate….not an easy task. I’ll never forget the day that we had to drive
over an hour out of our way to go…..back to a McDonald’s on the
interstate where we had eaten lunch. Fortunately, her dad was willing to dig
through garbage bags and was able to find the slimy thing. I am not sure I would have won any mother of
the year awards that day.
the dentist realized that her cheeks
looked like a greedy squirrel that had stored enough nuts away to last for the
next ten years. She was refitted with
something a little more
stylish appropriate for her mouth.
The following Sunday we had photographers at church because it was “Old
Fashion Sunday”…..and wouldn’t you know, it was her picture that was chosen to
go in the local newspaper.
Footnote: The short
haircut is another story….a bad perm had to be cut off (which I am now blamed for even though she
begged for it).
Sunday, October 27, 2013
Saturday, October 26, 2013
Thursday, October 24, 2013
While watching my two year old grandson, Ryder, the other day, I noticed he was eating something. Casually, I said, “Ryder, what are you eating?” I am thinking he managed to get to the candy corn used in a center piece on the kitchen table. With all the confidence in the world, he responds, “A booger!” There was no hesitation and no shame in his response. At least he is building his immune system…..I just hope he still gets included in “play dates”.
Friday, October 11, 2013
UGH! Having curly (OK, sometimes frizzy hair), I am always trying to find that perfect shampoo! I just want to look natural…..you know, like a movie star! I want my hair to smell like a tropical rain forest and feel healthy! With that said, I wish I could shop for shampoo like a man!
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Sunday, October 6, 2013
The next time you have to attend one of those mandatory meetings, try creating finger faces if you are bored! So, you are sitting in a meeting counting tiles, checking out who is having a good or bad hair day, clicking your ballpoint pen bored out of your mind, just remember that you have a creative imagination! Just start drawing on your fingers and snapping pictures with your phone. It could be more fun than you think! Now I am not saying any of the fingers in this picture belong to me (taken on data day at school), but I am not saying they aren't either!
Thursday, September 26, 2013
I have not ever written a song, but if I did I would dedicate it to teachers…..teachers who don’t get to use the restroom when Mother Nature calls. It would be sung to the tune of Folsom Prison Blues, and it would go something like this…….
“I hear the
pipes a clangin’, Clangin’ down the hall, And I ain't seen the bathroom since I
don’t know when.....I’m stuck in the classroom, and time keeps draggin’ on, but
the pipes keep a clangin’ on down the hall.
When I hear those pipes a clangin’, I hang my head and cry; I bet
there’s deans and children sitting in a stall, they've probably been drinkin’
coffee and sippin’ on some tea."
OK….I better stop before I get myself in
trouble! Now I just need to decide which
country artist should sing it for teachers everywhere!
Saturday, September 21, 2013
My printer hates me!
This past week I suddenly got a beep from the office intercom. The school secretary comes on and says, “Ms.
Wise, we just received a phone call from a school in another state, and they
are complaining because you are printing to their computer!” Did you pick up on the words, “ANOTHER
STATE”? She went on to explain that it
is a color printer so they are really frustrated! Of course, I am thinking, “Color, wow, I
wonder if they would mind mailing it to me!”
This just boggles my mind because I would not know how to
print to a computer in our neighboring town, Mulberry, much less a computer in
another state. Usually I just hit print
and it magically appears at my desk.
Of course, now I am afraid that every time I print, I am
wasting some schools precious colored ink, and another negative phone call is
forthcoming. I figure I have probably
made it to some FBI watch list at this point.
So now, with a sigh, I prayerfully push print, and hope it comes out at
my desk and not three states away. I
might just start putting another teacher’s name on everything I print just in
case the school gets any more complaints about my printing (I can always white
the name out later). Needless to say, I
have a rocky relationship with my computer.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Brenda, 7 Reasons Why You Are Fat! This is what I saw when I checked my inbox
this morning; it is from AARP. I could
not help but smile as I read the article to see the 7 reasons why I am
fat. They are as follows: 1. You don't plan at the buffet. 2. You're
not sleeping enough. 3. You need to relax more. 4. You're surrounded by excess.
5. You're eating addictive food. 6. You drink soda through a straw. 7. Your
tiny breakfast, big dinner.
My first thought was buffet…..Brenda does not
do buffets. I am not sure why they did
not include…..exercise. I definitely felt the article was weak, but what amazed
me was the response from the AARP subscribers…….offended! Personally, I thought the title was good
marketing; it enticed me to read it; however, what really caught my attention was
the ad in the margins……”A DDiscount For AARP members. Just show
your valid AARP membership card when you purchase any Large or Extra Large
beverage and get a FREE Donut!”
Thursday, September 12, 2013
Since I am a teacher, I have a stack of school pictures from years gone by! I have seen my daughters flip these photos and howl with laughter at the different hairdos, outfits, and smiles. I have to admit, a few of them should have had a “warning” label on them. Each year I meticulously place my feet on the tape on the floor, tilt my head slightly, look into the camera, and smile. Why, I even put on extra blush before I head in the auditorium so that I don’t look too pale. Yes, I probably look a little hookerish walking down the hall with the extra blush slathered on my face. BUT, let me tell you what I did this year…..my teachers friends are going to be soooooo jealous! The photographer called me up to the camera to see if I liked my picture. Smiling sweetly, I said, “Is there any way you can back the camera up and take it again?” Now I never dreamed the camera could actually be backed up. The photographer replied, “Sure!” So, the camera was backed up (woot woot). Who knows, I might actually like my picture this year! I am wondering, however, if my picture will look like a faraway dot compared to the other teachers’ pictures in the yearbook! One can hope!
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Girls and their periods! If I were writing a top ten comments list, this comment would definitely make the list. A female student approached me as she entered class today and said, “I just want to let you know that I might be grouchy for the next three days because I started my period!” Not really knowing how to respond, I replied, “Congratulations!” That was obviously not the right response because she then blurted out, “Congratulations! This is horrible!” In hind sight I realize that was a ridiculous response from me. This new event in her life was not shared with a quiet whisper but with boldness. Standing behind her was another female student who is not quite as….shall we say…..developed. She looked like I had just told her aliens would be taking over the school today! As the potential grouchy girl headed to her seat, I debated moving the boy she sits beside to the other side of the classroom just in case she decided to lash out at him during her “three day grouchy spell.
Monday, September 9, 2013
Have you ever walked in on someone in the restroom? If I made a list of awkward moments, walking
in on someone in the restroom would definitely be on my list. I must confess, I seem to have a knack for
doing this. Sunday I attempted to stroll
into the restroom at Marshall’s…..if you have ever used this particular
restroom, you are aware that the door swings open automatically once you start
opening it….and it is hard to close again; therefore, it is not like I could
quickly shut the door. Holding her dress
up and walking sort of like….hmmmmm…..a crab, this lady scurries to the door
and says, “I’m not done!” Obviously she
thinks I am intentionally keeping the door open. Unfortunately for her, the
main door to this little area was propped open, so people entering or exiting
the store were able to watch this play out.
Finally I get the door closed again only to look up at the exit area to
see a lady obviously howling with laughter (a friend of hers). I just smiled and shrugged. Secretly I was hoping the “crab walker” would
not try to kick my a@# when she came out.
Friday, September 6, 2013
Yesterday when I sat down at my desk at school, I discovered a frog. Unfortunately, he was all sprawled out…..dead! I gingerly took 500 paper towels and carried him to the trash can before the kids came in and discovered him! I smiled as I thought about fairy tales that imply we are all princesses waiting for our prince to come and save us so we can live happily ever after. Wouldn't you know mine would be dead……
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
OODLES of writing papers to grade! Ugh. It's kinda like laundry - it just never ends! How does a new or veteran teacher handle the hours of grading that can amount to a second full-time job? Now that I think of it, I think I need a skinny cow to go with my grading.
Sunday, September 1, 2013
I am no Martha Stewart! Last Thursday I decided to bake a retirement cake for a good friend of mine at school, Eunice. Actually her name is Beverly, but I gave her the retirement name of Eunice. Now this cake was no ordinary box cake. The ingredients called for chocolate chips, sour cream, powered sugar, salt free butter (not sure why)…..etc. MMMMMM…..the house smelled so good while it was baking; however, I knew I was in trouble when I tried to get it out of the pans.
“Don’t panic!” I thought; after all, I know how to fix a broken cake. There is always a solution, right? I knew I needed to focus on what I could do before racing out to the store for a last minute substitute. At 10:00 PM I was online reading things like….How to Fix a Shrunken Cake, Repair a Cake that Looks Like Crap, Manage your Temper when the Cake Sticks to the Pan, and How to Add Rum to a Cake. I was leaning towards the last one, but I figured I would not be able to take it to school.
In the end, I did the best I could trying to mend it with the icing. Did I mention the icing was made from scratch too? As I headed to bed, I said a quick prayer over my cake! Standing in front of the refrigerator the next morning, rubbing my eyes, I could not believe what I saw. My made from scratch cake looked like a boys soccer team had played a game on it! Yep…..it was really bad. I thought, “I can still take it to school and just pretend it was intentional!” In the end, I made that last minute race to the store for a store bought cake! It was a big hit!
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Even though it is early in the year, I already have a number
of sick students. I am absolutely astounded at how loud a 6th grade
boy can blow his nose. Some of my “nose
blowers” sound like a race car flying around the track, or a musical instrument
of some sort. Sometimes when the “nose
blower” starts, I will actually glance around the room thinking everyone is
going to be snickering or disgusted; however, they are usually all on task and appear
to be oblivious to the racket. It is probably
just as well that they appear to be unaware that there is suddenly a herd of
elephants in the classroom because I might accidentally give them my, “I know,
right?” look. Maybe when I see a student
approach the Kleenex box, I should announce, “Everybody take cover!”
Monday, August 26, 2013
Have you ever wondered if mannequins have butt cracks? You have probably not ever asked yourself this question…..or if you have, you are not going to admit it! I know I have not ever pondered this question; however, obviously my grandson, Brady, has! Recently while at the mall, I noticed he and a buddy were standing in back of a male mannequin snickering rather loudly. I quickly realized what they were doing, as did Brady’s mom who instantly put a stop to it. Just in case you are wondering what the answer is…..”Yes”….at least this one had a butt crack according to my grandson (of course I did not peek). I can only imagine what the future of mannequins will be. I would suspect they will have robotic gestures and will turn to look at their watch, wink at people passing by, point to something in the distance, or, who knows, ride a trike around a toy store!
Sunday, August 25, 2013
Frizzy Unruly Hair.....Welcome to your daily weather update…HUMID. It just so
happens that I have Scott hair….I was taught this at a young age….Scott, meaning
my bloodline (James and Mary Scott). So,
as a young child I learned that Scott hair is curly hair that quickly becomes
frizzy in humid weather. If you have
curly hair, you know that it just does not mix with humidity. Almost every day is a bad hair day. Gels, frizz control products, mud, oils, and humidity
hairsprays just don’t work. I feel like
I am always looking for products and/or shortcuts to keep the frizzies at
bay. Every month in Florida is
August! I have always wanted straight
silky hair…you know the kind that flips back and forth in an adorable pony tail
when you jog (of course I would have to take up jogging to experience
this). So, to all my curly headed friends, I
feel your pain.
Thursday, August 22, 2013
I have twins in my class again this year….identical twin boys. Yesterday I asked one of them what the best way to tell them apart would be. Now I am thinking of physical characteristics. I am looking for a telltale feature…for example, a freckle, mole, eye brow arch, a bigger nose, creased earlobe, or even thinner fingers. I am subtly scanning his face as I wait for his response. He excitedly takes off his glasses to show me that the inside arm of his glasses is a different color than his identical twin brother. I might be in a little trouble here.
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Online Dating. As I
prepare my classroom for this new school year, I have hooked up four computers,
a SmartBoard, a printer capable of printing in two locations, and a document
camera. The good news is everything is
working! The bad news is….one of my student
computers keeps giving me a message in Chinese; I have absolutely no idea what
it is telling me! Hopefully I have not
connected with an online dating site in China.
I might need the network manager on this one.
Sunday, August 11, 2013
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Red Light Alert. I should not admit to this, I know. Driving down the road the other day, I suddenly realized a red light was flashing on the dashboard of my new sparkly car. The word, “Pass”, was displayed with the annoying red light. I thought, “Pass…..is this car telling me I need to pass?” Then I realized there was a seat belt picture displayed behind the tomato red light. Finally, I figured out what the problem was…..my purse was so heavy that the car thought there was a passenger sitting beside me and that he/she had failed to put their seat belt on! Obviously the sensor was getting annoyed that the GUY (*smile*) was not buckled in. Stupid sensor…..what does it know? I guess I am going to have to start buckling my purse up too!
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Potty Training! I
remember the struggle of trying to potty train my son, Buck. I can remember pulling up to his preschool
day after day and seeing him standing there sweetly smiling, holding a plastic
bag that contained his soiled big boy underpants. I started worrying that I might still be working
on potty training him in middle school.
Watching my daughter, Jodi, work on potty
training with her son, Ryder, has been interesting. I noticed that the sticker chart wasn't working, the M & M’s weren't working, nor was the poopy dance.
up with a wonderful idea for anyone having trouble getting their little one to
cooperate with potty training. The “Poop
Fairy”! Think of the Tooth Fairy……only
this magical fairy leaves little gifts under the child’s pillow if he or she
has success on the potty!
matchbox cars (from a garage sale), gum, candy, etc. Sometimes she would resort to using one gummy
bear from a pack. You could even
purchase a specific toy that involves many pieces and put one under the pillow
each time there is success. If you think
a treat for each success is overkill, you could use the sticker chart, and
after x number of successes, then the fairy leaves a gift under the pillow.
a lot of verses in the Bible that speak to parenting, like, “Train up a child
in the way he should go, and when he is old, he shall not depart from it”
(Proverbs 22:6); however, I sure could have used a few verses about potty
training a child in the way they should go!
Unfortunately, such a potty training manual cannot be found in the
need some free potty training charts, here is a great site!
son, Buck, was eventually potty trained; hopefully he is not still wearing
Masters of the Universe underwear.
Potty Training! I remember the struggle of trying to potty train my son, Buck. I can remember pulling up to his preschool day after day and seeing him standing there sweetly smiling, holding a plastic bag that contained his soiled big boy underpants. I started worrying that I might still be working on potty training him in middle school.
Watching my daughter, Jodi, work on potty training with her son, Ryder, has been interesting. I noticed that the sticker chart wasn't working, the M & M’s weren't working, nor was the poopy dance.
Jodi came up with a wonderful idea for anyone having trouble getting their little one to cooperate with potty training. The “Poop Fairy”! Think of the Tooth Fairy……only this magical fairy leaves little gifts under the child’s pillow if he or she has success on the potty!
Jodi used matchbox cars (from a garage sale), gum, candy, etc. Sometimes she would resort to using one gummy bear from a pack. You could even purchase a specific toy that involves many pieces and put one under the pillow each time there is success. If you think a treat for each success is overkill, you could use the sticker chart, and after x number of successes, then the fairy leaves a gift under the pillow.
There are a lot of verses in the Bible that speak to parenting, like, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he shall not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6); however, I sure could have used a few verses about potty training a child in the way they should go! Unfortunately, such a potty training manual cannot be found in the scriptures.
If you need some free potty training charts, here is a great site!
son, Buck, was eventually potty trained; hopefully he is not still wearing
Masters of the Universe underwear.
Footnote: My son, Buck, was eventually potty trained; hopefully he is not still wearing Masters of the Universe underwear.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Every year teachers strive to make their classroom warm and inviting to students. A couple years ago, as I attempted to come up with a bulletin board that would make my room pop, I decided to visit JoAnn’s Fabric Store so I could make a DIY fabric covered bulletin board. I don’t consider myself particularly crafty, but I was determined to give it my best.
Walking out the door twenty minutes later, I felt I had the perfect solution to an attention getting bulletin board. I had purchased a large piece of material covered in bright rainbows on a black background. I loved it!
The following day, I excitedly headed to my classroom to create my magical bulletin board. Finally, standing back, I admired my colorful and eye catching creative work. Now I was ready to greet my students with a warm and welcoming smile at the door on the first day of school.
Within a couple days I had a stream of teachers stopping by my classroom to view my colorful vibrant bulletin board. Now don’t think I am bragging here…..they were not stopping by because they heard it was outstanding, but because they heard it looked like a bunch of male private parts.
How I missed it, I don’t know, but as I stood
back and looked, I thought, “Oops, there it is!” I am sure my howling could be heard down the
hall. Needless to say, I had to endure a
giggles cackling. Thank goodness the principal never
stopped by! I don’t think it is written
in the school rules, but you just can’t have a “male private part” bulletin
board in middle school!
Needless to say, you will not find my bulletin board on Pinterest! Now it is that time of year again when teachers start thinking about their bulletin boards….I think I will just head to Teacher’s Exchange this year!
Does God have a sense of humor? I have never heard a sermon about God's sense of humor, or read a theology book that lists God's laughter as one of his characteristics; however, I see him as having a sense of humor. If we do not see that side of God, I am not sure we will totally appreciate Him. I can picture Him smiling and rolling his eyes as I hung my bulletin board! Proverbs 17:22 – “A cheerful heart is good medicine.”
Footnote: I have not ever been asked to decorate the bulletin board in the hallway. Thank goodness!
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Shopping with children is not for the weak! Throwing a penny in the fountain, the bubble gum machine, an overstuffed umbrella stroller (filled with cheerios), a carousel ride in the children’s play area (germs), nursing in a dressing room, a visit to the toy store (touching, touching, touching), backtracking for the baby shoe that fell off along the way, carry me whines, breaking up fights, bathroom breaks (more germs), losing a kid in the clothing racks, petting a puppy at the pet store (begging), meltdowns, finding a place to change that diaper (you know the one that oozed out and up the babies back...UGH, and ice cream……Oh the memories of taking my three children to the mall! The bribes only worked so long. At some point during the shopping experience, I would choose having my eyeballs rubbed with sandpaper over shopping! I can vaguely remember, what seems like a previous life, shopping all day and having a leisurely lunch!
Finally finding that perfect outfit for myself, I make it to the dressing room (saying a sweet prayer under my breath) Getting undressed in a tiny
jail cell with three kids is not fun! They
could care less about the wonderful buy or how the outfit looks on mama. Somewhere along the way, that sweet prayer, turns
into….well.…shall we say a “THREAT”.
Of course history repeats itself! Here are two of my grandsons on a recent shopping trip! I tried to keep them entertained so their mom could do some shopping. We played dare, and you are going to marry the next person that walks by; I think I made that game up (it did not go to well for me)! Trying on masks was definitely a big hit!
Parents today can sit at home in their PJ's and shop online….so you are not likely to go on a killing spree. However, if you are going shopping with children, you better get your big girl britches on and your armor.
This is the day which the Lord hath made;
we will rejoice and be glad in it.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,because you know that the testing
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,because you know that the testing
of your faith develops perseverance.
Monday, July 22, 2013
I just spent the last several days babysitting my grandkids
Brock and Brady and my granddog! My granddog,
Vader, totally controls me! Vader is a
four year old pitch black Cockapoo. He has three inch long eyelashes which curl up
all on their own (I am jealous), with dark chocolate eyes that give him the ability
to look sad at all times; he uses this look to manipulate me.
Morning sweet morning!
When my feet hit the floor, I am not taking care of the needs of the
boys….oh no, Vader comes first. He does
not realize I do not like to go outside in pajamas, so he gets very impatient as
I get dressed. Prancing through the
grass he tugs and tugs on the leash determined to use the neighbor’s yard….NOT
his own. Back inside Vader is jumping at
me for a treat for peeing in the neighbor’s yard (which he gets)!
The boys have now settled in front of a video game
(shhhhhhhhh). As I am trying to be nana
of the year and discuss what they want for breakfast, Vader is now talking to
me by making raspy breathy sounds that
come from deep within his throat…..wanting his breakfast. So, the boys are back on hold as I get Vader fed.
Now, back to the little people and their breakfast……oops…not
quite so fast! Vader now wants to make
sure I know that he gets a spoonful of peanut butter. Of course he does not realize a tiny little
white pill is hidden in it for seizures.
I did not realize his tongue is about a foot and a half long until I
watched him eat his peanut butter/pill mixture.
My daughter, Jenny, stressed that I not forget to give him his medicine;
how could I forget, he reminded me like clockwork.
Whew, now I am back discussing breakfast options! I now heard the click, click, click of Vader’s
nails as he jumps at the front door wanting to go for his morning
constitutional walk. The school teacher
in me is now wondering if “time out” works for dogs! Promising
the boys that I will fix breakfast soon, I head out with Vader on a leash
hoping I can get him past the neighbor’s green green grass since this is going
to be a little more serious. He
obviously does not like to cootie up his own yard!
Finally, the little ones get to eat sausage, eggs, and
toast! Guess who was under my feet the
entire time I cooked! Vader is certainly
very pampered and humanized. I don’t
know about the boys, but the dog certainly thinks I am nana of the year!
Vader’s behavior reminds me of what a loving master he
has! Looking back over the last few
days, I am reminded of my loving Master!
He leads me, feeds me, and brings me amazing blessings. God knows us in such a personal way. He knows what is important to us and what is
weighing on our heart. He sees our joys,
burdens, and sorrows. He wants us to
walk with him! He has provided us the
keys that will bring happiness, contentment, and joy.
Be still, and
know that I am God... Psalm 46:10
Wednesday, July 3, 2013
When you leave a store without making a purchase, do you ever feel a slight panic as you ask yourself, “Am I still carrying anything around with me? Do I still have on anything I tried on?”
Yesterday as I was leaving Bealls with my new running tennis shoes (no, I don’t run, but they are adorable), I hear a lady yelling, “Miss!” I turn to see her walking towards me at a brisk pace. Still not sure if she means me, I yell, “Who, me?” To which she responds, “YES!” With my heart pounding, I am mentally preparing myself for a strip-search right there in the parking lot. My sweaty hands are tightly clutching my new turquoise running shoes as she approaches. I was PUNKED…wickedly laughing in a nearby car sat a friend of mine, Valerie Hillman, who had maliciously put her sister up to this!
I have not ever been arrested, and I can’t imagine that I ever will be at this point in my life; however, since I am a speed dialer, I would be in trouble when I was told I could make my one phone call. At this point, my cell phone (tucked sweetly inside its blue/turquoise flowery and sparkled case - BLING) along with the rest of my valuables (purse and five shades of lipstick) would be locked in a vault in another part of the facility.
Come to think of it, if I am ever arrested at….hmmmmm let’s say for some kind of protest or something, I DO know my work number. I am not sure if it is proper etiquette to call the school where you work if you are arrested, but if it comes to this, I will definitely ask for Valerie Hillman.
Monday, July 1, 2013
Banana Pudding at Nana's House
Creamy Banana Pudding
1 (14 oz.) can Eagle Brand Sweetened Condensed Milk
1 ½ cups cold water
1 (4-serving size) package instant vanilla flavor pudding and pie filling mix
2 cups Cool Whip
36 vanilla wafers
3 medium bananas, sliced
In large bowl, combine sweetened condensed milk and water. Add pudding mix; beat well. Chill 5 minutes. Fold in whipped cream. Spoon 1 cup pudding mixture into 2 ½-quart glass serving bowl. Top with one-third each of the wafers, bananas, and pudding. Repeat layering twice, ending with pudding. Chill thoroughly.
Sunday, June 30, 2013
Everything was in order and as the pastor was preparing to leave, the woman suddenly remembered one final request that was very important to her. "Please Pastor, just one more thing, she said excitedly. "Sure, what is it?" came the pastor's reply. "This is very important to me, the woman continued....I want to be buried holding a fork in my right hand. The Pastor gazed at the woman, at a loss for words.
"That surprises you, doesn't it?" the woman asked.
The Pastor replied "well to be quite honest, I'm puzzled by the request." The woman explained. "You see, Pastor, in all my years of attending Church socials and potluck dinners, I remember that when the dishes were being cleared after the main course, someone would inevitably lean over to me and say "Keep Your Fork". It was my favorite part because I knew that something better was coming, like velvety chocolate cake or deep dish apple pie. Something wonderful, and with substance to end the great meal.
The Pastor listened intently and a smile came upon his face.
The woman continued, "so, I just want people to see me there in the casket with a folk in my hand and I want them to wonder.....What's with the folk? ......than I want you to tell them: "KEEP YOUR FORK"....the best is yet to come.
The Pastor eyes welled up with tears of joy as he hugged the woman good-bye. He knew that this would be one of the last times that he would see her before her death. But he also knew that the woman had a better grasp of HEAVEN than he did. She KNEW and trusted that the best was yet to come.
At the funeral, everyone that walked by the woman's casket saw her wearing a beautiful dress with her favorite Bible held in her left hand and a fork held in her right hand. Over and over, the pastor heard people ask the question, "Why is she holding a fork?" and his smile began to get larger and brighter each time.
During his message, the Pastor told the people about the conversation that he had with the woman shortly before she died. He explained the fork and what it symbolized to her.
The Pastor told everyone how he could not stop thinking about the fork and how he hoped that they would not be able to stop thinking about it either. That fork, and the meaning of it to the woman, had quite the impact on everyone and they are still sharing the story with people they meet.
And now it has been shared with you....so the next time you reach for your fork, let it remind you, oh so gently, that the best is yet to come....